Your horoscope for the week of 3/23 – 3/30 Academy Staff March 23, 2015 Entertainment Can you read the stars to predict your fate? Unfortunately, they’re in Braille, but here’s a translation! ARIES (March 21 – April 20) Embrace rabbits, good Italian, and the number 26. Avoid bunnies, bad Italian, and death. TAURUS (April 21 – May 21) You will run into an old friend, but not if they can help it. GEMINI (May 22 – June 21) Be sure to say yes to everything. And could you give me five dollars? CANCER (June 22 – July 22) You will get into your favorite college, but only if you can get past security. LEO (July 23 – August 22) Help only those who strive to help you. It will leave you with a ton of free time. VIRGO (August 23 – September 23) Avoid Aries, Tauruses, Geminis, Cancers, Leos, Libras, Scorpios, Sagittariuses, Capricorns, Aquariuses, and Pisces. Please. It’s better for everyone that way. LIBRA (September 24 – October 23) You will achieve enlightenment, only to lose it moments later. SCORPIO (October 24 – November 22) Success is a two-way street, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re on a tricycle. SAGITTARIUS (November 23 – December 21) Keep your chin up and your head down. This may require surgery. CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 20) Stay true to yourself, as always. Stay false to your friends and family, as always. AQUARIUS (January 21 – February 19) Always be punctual PISCES (February 20 – March 20) Never overestimate your own abilities. You shouldn’t underestimate them, either, but that’d be pretty difficult in your case. Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published.CommentName* Email* Website Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email.